As parents we have obviously spent more time on this mortal coil than our children. And, as adults we know that life is not always fair, that mistakes can be our best teachers. One of mine learned in the sound proof examination room at the conservatorium in Melbourne (last century) was when the examiner asked me what a Minuet was , I could feel the beads of perspiration on my furrowed brow but had no idea, I have never forgotten many years later that it is a French dance. To make matters worse I failed the piano exam. My initial reaction was to close the lid of the piano and never again tinkle those ivories.
But as luck would have it I was surrounded by positive people who believed in me and saw this as a stumble as opposed to falling off Mount Everest to be lost forever in an avalanche.can be a lesson in sharing, compassion, a lesson in spirit of generosity, knowing that next time things could be different, strength to overcome disappointment (especially if it a chocolate biscuit) and move forward in life knowing that there is always going to be another opportunity at some time or another to learn that anything worth having is worth waiting for.
As we thumb through the ‘how to’ books of what to do and what not to do, we often lose sight of what is one of the most important things we can give our children to ensure they grow up to be resilient adults and that is; to provide a secure predictable base, one they can depend on, one where the boundaries have continuity (not changing like leaves blowing in the wind) there is a sense of safety and stability, an environment where there is emotional and physical support, respect, laughter, happiness and genuine joy in being with.
Lesley McConnell - author of BLACK TEARS